Pixiq

Today isn't starting off well.  I was hoping that if I could get through three prints, I'd wind up with six order to pack and drop at Fedex and that would almost bring me up to date; or let's say I'd be about 10 days behind with a few orders which isn't terrible.

So I do my nozzle check on the Epson 7800, and lo and behold, it looks perfect.

I put my sheet of Epson Exhibition F paper in and sit down on the edge of the futon to watch a bit of Law and Order, Criminal Intent while I sip the bitter espresso I made.

If you are an everyday inkjet printer, you know where this is going.  Yes, the print finishes and the sheet hangs there a bit before I get up; I sort of like to let it dry while it's in the vertical position - superstitious - or makes sense.  Dunno.

And I walk it over to the viewing area (yes the cabinet that has a daylight lamp) and I see the dreaded gaps between the ink lines.  I haven't changed anything about the printer settings in months.  Maybe longer.

But there it is.  It needs at least one more head cleaning, not to mention that I've just wasted the 13 x 19 sheet, and whatever ink I used.

So now while I'm writing this in draft mode, I've just finished cleaning the head again, and now I'm going to print the nozzle check.

Now I hit "confirmation." That does have a religious overtone.  Or maybe scientific.

And look at the test.  And there's just one very tiny gap in the light Cyan.  Okay.  I'll do another nozzle check and print.  That will have made 3 tests.  And I'll be smarter this time and do a smaller print first.

Oh, and now that it's fall, they've decided to start jack hammering in the backyard.  I'm on the third floor.  On one side of the building they're tearing up the street for the 2nd Avenue Subway.  That sound isn't too bad.  Or else I've gotten used to it.

But the backyard melody of jackhammer on concrete is much closer, so loud that I can't hear the t.v. and it's giving me a headache, so I've turned on the air-conditioner, even though it's raining, on the high fan setting to drown out the jackhammering, and now it's the end of the first Law and Order of the Day and I haven't made any progress other than writing this piece about not making progress.

The epson 4800 is behind me.  I use it to print things like Certificates of Authenticity which I then sign and date; and framing instructions, and Fedex labels.  And I figure that while I'm printing the next piece on the 7800 I'll print a few instruction pages on the 4800 only to see that one of the ink lights is flashing red.

Man, how did I miss that.  I just ordered ink for the 7800, but when I checked the 4800 before ordering I didn't see anything lower than 1/2.  There must be an ink vampire in the house.  Now there's the premise for a good story.  A bunch of kids figure out (not that it's so hard) how to drain out printer ink without the owner knowing... It's actually more expensive than blood.

Okay. Last check.  You can go for "Print" or "Auto."  Just know that if you pick "Auto," you are going to go through pints of ink and it will never end.  I think the "Auto" button is actually connected to a light at the Epson Board of Directors table where all the wasted ink is being measured and displayed in a colorful spinning wheel.  Someone is rubbing their hands with glee when that "Auto" button is hit.

It's along the lines of "Do you feel lucky punk?  Well do ya?"

And so now the print head moves across the 9.5 x 13 inch piece of paper.  Yes, I cut the 13 x 19 inch sheets in half to get to pieces for 8 x 12 inches out of it.

And I realize that I haven't had breakfast yet (10:30) and that I've run out of cigars, which is really what I feel like having.  (Remember, I gave up cigarettes three months ago.)

The first 8 x 12 print finishes.  The concrete-buster stops.  I hear rain falling on the air-conditioner.  And the second episode of Law and Order is almost done.  And I hold the 8 x 12 up to the light, and - phew - it looks perfect.  I check it carefully, especially the edges, and then put under the cover of an epson box, which is how I let the prints dry.  they get air, but dust won't settle on the print.

Once in a while, the next day, I will find that a speck of white has somehow either landed on the paper, or during the drying something happened so that it shows through.  That's easy to fix given that the prints are all black and white.  The slightest touch with a black pen will make it disappear.

And now I'm on to my next print...  The larger one.  Hopefully, for you and me, I won't have to write anything else in this post; but frankly, this is the typical start to a printing day.

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Here are two incomplete lists of things that I 1) have to do to keep the business going and 2) the stuff I need to keep in stock.  I know, they're just lists.  Who in the world writes lists or even thinks they are interesting?

I'll tell you who.

He goes back a long way.  Born around 1484.  Some say he was a doctor, others a lawyer, and still others both.

He was a master of the run on sentence.  And if you think that lists can't be literature - take a look at Gargantuan where you will be treated to lists of phrases that would shock a modern audience that go on for pages and pages.

Yes - the author of Gargantua and Pantagruel - two of the funniest novels ever written - Francois Rabelais 

If you think that todays comics are getting into blue material - pick up Gargantua and you will find that the French once had a sense of humor.

Unfortunately, my lists aren't that funny.  However, what is funny is to see if you can find the one thing in these lists that is the entire raison d'etre for this business.  It is gently and definitely, buried.

Printing Shipping Label, Taking Pictures, Deciding Which Pictures Go In Store, Deciding Which Pictures Go in Blog, Packaging Prints, Ordering and Checking Supplies, Printing Photos, Backing up / Archiving Files, Printing Certificates of Authenticity, Printing Framing Instructions, Notifying Host if Site Has Problems, Writing a Blog Post, Corresponding with potential Customers, Doing Projects, generally for Publicity, Replacing Print if Fedex Messes Up, Sending Invoices and usage rights for high-res files.

Finding a Place to Store Packaging and Matting Material (large flat manila folders, four sizes of corrugated cardboard,  four sizes of pre-cut window mats, backboards, four sizes of clear bags, linen tape, archival mounting strips, Fedex clear address envelopes - domestic and international, 220 ml ink cartridges for 7800 and 4800 printers, maintenance tanks for printers, archival boxes for storing finished prints...